7 things I learned from watching Young, Famous, and African

  1. Women are the champagne in the glass while men are like the cherry on top”. Zari said this when on a girl date with Khanyi when Khanyi asked her about her relationship with her baby daddy Diamond Platnumz and other men. Zari is known for being a boss lady and I totally agree with this quote. It’s the more classy way of saying what Beyonce what trying to encapsulate in her “Who runs the world? Girls” song. In some creation stories, woman is created second but clearly out of necessity because man could clearly not flourish alone. The woman was needed to create more life and beauty in the world. Men, don’t fret. Cherries are nice to have around as well 🙂
  2. When you’re powerful and confident, expect haters. Zari the boss lady shows up in Episode 2 but steals the show from that point as in Episode 1, Khanyi was trying to be the queen of the squad. In my opinion, Zari is the most attractive woman on the show and has a bit more class because she is a businesswoman even though she may have started as a “well kept” woman by marrying for money. Is Zari perfect? No. She can definitely be a little over-flirtatious but she owns who she is. She has that “take or leave it” vibe which you can only have if you are very confident in yourself and to be honest, isn’t that how we should all be?
  3. Apologizing is not a sign of weakness. I will applaud the male Young, Famous, and African stars on the show because they really don’t have a lot of drama because they know how to apologize. This is especially evident on the show when DJ Naked apologizes to Swanky, the best stylist in Africa, about a shouting match that occurred where DJ Naked was supporting Zari in her fight with Swanky and Khanyi over some rudeness that Zari had felt from Khanyi while Zari was trying to give a speech. These men had been involved in a fight that wasn’t even about them which goes to show that women are definitely the bubbly champagne that fizzes up sometimes while men try to float above the drama. So in that case, we definitely need women for reality TV.
  4. Don’t be too friendly with other people’s spouses. I’ve definitely been a victim of this because if I’m at a party, I usually try to talk to both male and female party attendees. As mentioned before, Zari is a bit flirtatious and at one point, she pulls 2Face Idibia aside to talk to him privately while his wife Annie is also at the party. To me and his wife, this seemed unnecessary and rude. Annie goes to interrupt their private conversation and Zari tells her that she is “insecure” in front of her husband. From that point on, there’s a war between Annie and Zari. When 2Face Idibia re-proposes to Annie after years of cheating, Annie decides not to invite Zari to her vow renewal ceremony. To be honest, I don’t blame Annie in this situation. I think Zari has to learn the line between being friendly and being overly flirtatious.
  5. How you dress can be one of the easiest ways to express yourself. As mentioned before, Swanky is a top fashion stylist and how he dresses lets you know that this man is creative, confident, and daring. His looks alone are so unique yet so cool that you probably have never seen anyone wear the outfits he puts together. The way Zari dresses exudes class and maturity. The way Khanyi dresses shows off the plastic surgery augmentations that she has. The way Nadia dresses expresses her young, “crazy, sexy, and cool” vibe. I don’t really like how Annie dresses because most of her clothes are ill-fitting or just too “avant-garde” in my opinion. I really liked the suit that DJ Naked wore when they had rented out a train for a 48-hour retreat and had a casino night inside the train. DJ Naked’s girlfriend is probably the least affluent person on the show and she dresses pretty well for her budget which I respect because designer labels don’t make an outfit. You can wear a $50 outfit and still look better than someone who spent $5,000.
  6. Don’t date out of boredom. I think Diamond Platnumz really dates out of boredom because he doesn’t really seem to have any dating criteria. The man doesn’t even know “for sure” if he has 5 or 6 children. He speculates that he may have fathered some children but doesn’t seem to put much effort in figuring out if those children are really his. So far, we know that he has 3 baby mamas: Zari, Donna Tanasha, and Hamisa Bometo. In his speculation, he says some other women have told his mother that they may have children for him. That is a total hot mess and shows a person who is not doing his “level best” to protect himself from women who want to use him for child support. He’s definitely not a victim though as he has cheated on women whom he was in serious relationships with such as Zari who he had a four-year relationship that ended in divorce as well as Tanasha who ended their engagement due to infidelity as well. It is clear on the show that Diamond may still have feelings for Zari even though he dates other women. And Zari makes it clear that she loves to co-parent with Diamond but he is no longer a romantic interest due to his inability to “hold her down”. As such, Diamond is out in these streets dating out of boredom because the woman he probably wants doesn’t want him anymore or she’s teaching him a lesson. Either way, it makes for good reality TV.
  7. Keeping tabs on your man and dismissing it as “checking on your property” is not cute. In fact, the word “insecure” that Zari used is the most appropriate here. Should have Zari communicated that to Annie’s face, especially in front of her husband? No! But is the word “insecure” the most fitting? Hell Yes! If you have to go online to check what your husband is doing because he is famous or look through his phone because he is a commoner, then you’re in the wrong relationship. I am so glad 2face apologized to Annie for his misdeeds and proposed to renew their vows. But honey! This man has fathered 5 children outside of his marriage. Some women are clearly built different because I don’t know how someone can continue to disrespect you like that and you continue to stay. Sure you said vows that said “till death do us part” but someone would be metaphorically dead to me if they mishandled our marriage like that. I also do make a distinction between emotional and physical cheating but if you’re physically cheating, then maybe one should make sure that nobody gets pregnant? But let me get off my high horse and let people live their lives. Do you boo 🙂 ❤

Black is King by Beyoncé – Review

beyonce pic2
Beyoncé in Black is King, 2020

Black is King. A simple three-word phrase that is synonymous with Beyoncé telling us fellow Black humans that we are glorious. In fact, she says “let Black be synonymous with glory.” If we focus on just glorifying blackness at the root, then she did that. But if we think about blackness as a big oak tree rather than a root, then she only scratched the surface. And she scratched that surface beautifully, might I add. With her beautiful rhythm of dance, color in super HD quality, regal hairstyles, and the celebration of black bodies, she did that exceedingly beautifully. However, what missed the mark for me was that the Black is King story focused on Africa. Yes, the Lion King is African and blackness as well as humanity originates in Africa but the Africa she chose to focus on was historical Africa instead of showcasing present-day Africa as well.

This is evident in the focus on historic Egyptian headpieces and traditional hairstyles such as those seen below.

It is also evident in the landscapes chosen as the backdrops chosen for the Black is King film which present Africa as just beautiful Natural Geographic worthy scenes without showcasing the developed cityscapes of Africa. Again, I do think that her point was to show historic Africa rather than present-day Africa so I can understand that vision. However, I am sure Beyoncé does not in the bushes when she visits African countries so why not the 5-star African hotels that she probably frequents. Why not show the Africa that exists today? Why not show landscapes different from what National Geographic shows already? Sure, adding her body and several dancers couples with great costumes does show a different perspective but this vision could have been bigger. Even the movie Black Panther tried to connect Africa with African Americans in the end with the scene shot in Compton. On the same note, I think Beyoncé could have tried to connect more dots in the film Black is King. Black is not just King when it relates to Africa. Black is King in the NBA, in the NFL, in music, in educational excellence, and the list goes on. People might say I am missing the point of the film but please think about the fact that Beyoncé’s last three tours did not include any African countries. So with that record, I can see how people can interpret that Beyoncé doesn’t truly care about Africa and is just using African culture for capitalistic gain. However, I do have to applaud her for her effort in glorifying Blackness. I did feel proud to be black while watching Black is King so if that was her mission then she achieved it. However, if she was trying to make a statement on Africa then she definitely missed that mark. Let me remind you that Africa is a continent made up of 54 countries. Fifty-Four. So maybe we are asking too much from Beyoncé in representing Africa cohesively. Maybe we should not expect that a film that is one hour and 25 minutes long can do so much for us. With that said, maybe we should just appreciate Black is King for what it is: a film with impeccable costumes, storytelling, and rhythm in dance as well as music.

The music is actually my favorite part about Black is King with “Find your way back” as my top song pick. I also appreciate that Beyoncé made an effort to collaborate with African musicians such as Yemi Alade, Shatta Wale, and Wizkid. While the representation of Africa was not cohesive,  I found the music to be well organized. I think great music is what we can truly expect from the multi-Grammy award-winning artists that Beyoncé is and she did that beautifully. So Beyoncé, please don’t go chasing waterfalls the next time you’re in Africa. We’ve seen enough African waterfalls. Show us something different. Please and Thank you.

New York City Trip Review

March 2019, Brooklyn Bridge

I would like to start by sharing a quote that I read on a billboard while walking around New York City that stated that “NYC is like a pretty woman smoking a cigar”. It is kind of rough around the edges and definitely not everyone can survive living there. But they also say “if you can make it in NYC, you can make it everywhere”. I am fortunate to say that I have two friends who I grew up with in Alabama who are making it in NYC and I enjoyed hanging out with them. This was not my first time in NYC but 2015 was the last time I was there so a trip was long overdue. My review of the city starts with a food review because NYC is truly a melting pot where you can find cuisine from all over the world.

Food. I have never had a bad meal in NYC. This time around I was mostly looking forward to trying Peruvian food because my best friend is always talking about it. So when I saw a Peruvian restaurant in Queens called Jora, I was excited to try it out. My best friend recommended Ceviche which is raw seafood marinated with lime and onions. I am not a fan of raw fish, to be honest, but they also served a complimentary snack of banana chips with avocado/lime sauce which was so delicious that I have to try to recreate it at home. My friend also took me to a Greek restaurant called Taverna Kyclades which was great for me because I had been craving calamari that week. With calamari as the appetizer, I ordered lamb chops and lemon potatoes. The food was decent but my friend claims that the Taverna Kyclades in Queens is better than the one we went to. The best restaurant we experienced was Soco in Brooklyn which is black-owned and soul food/creole inspired. I had previously frequented this restaurant in 2015 with some college friends for brunch and I loved their fried chicken with red velvet waffles. Yes! Red Velvet waffles! My friend ordered the gumbo and we both enjoyed it. This time around I did not eat any street food but make sure to check out the halal food trucks if you’re ever in NYC.


Tourist attractions. NYC has a lot of tourist attractions but I am not really drawn to a lot of them such as the Statue of Liberty. My favorite attraction is the Brooklyn Bridge because the lower part of the bridge is for cars and the upper part is for pedestrians where you can walk while getting an amazing view of the NYC skyline. I also love Central Park just because it is so huge and is usually a great place to people watch. My friend and I also went to the top of the empire state building which had a great view of the skyline at night with all the lights all over the city. Surprisingly, we went on a Thursday and there were a lot of tourists there especially from France. I joked to my friend that French people view NYC the way American people view Paris: full of romance, class, and adventure. So Paris 2020 anyone?


Night Life. On this trip, I was really looking to find a club that plays African music because that is something I do not get to experience where I live down South. I found an event in Brooklyn hosted by an African DJ in a lounge. My friend and I showed up an hour late to the event but we ended up being among the first 5 people there including the DJ. While we waited for more people to show up, I took the chance to play the DJ’s electronic drums which was actually pretty fun as you can see in the video below (sorry for the horrible quality).  By the end of the night, only 20 people had shown up but we still enjoyed as the DJ was on fire playing all the Afrobeats bangers. On my previous trips to NYC, I have gone to American clubs which are all over the place and can get really packed. That was a while back though so I won’t give any recommendations because things might have changed. But NYC still remains as the city that never sleeps so don’t sleep on it.

Accommodation & Transport. Ubers can be a pretty expensive way to travel since the city is so expansive. It is a necessary evil though mainly for airport trips and when you’ve exhausted all your energy by dancing all night. However, the train system in NYC is world class. Usually, it will take about the same travel time as a car to take the train as train stops are everywhere and the wait times are short. Also, NYC trains are known to have talented individuals displaying their talents in hopes of being discovered and making a bit of money. And of course trains and buses are much cheaper than Ubers. For accommodation, there are usually deals on Groupon especially during the offseason (Spring and Fall). I chose to stay at a hotel in Queens because LaGuardia Airport is in Queens and I did not want to be late to the airport as usual. Also, I have always wanted to stay in Queens after watching Coming to America with Eddie Murphy and Yes, I ❤ NY.


Thanks for reading! 🙂